


Asit Tal-Eb

by redhandsredribbons



Series: Other Paths [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Canon Queer Character of Color, Character Development, Crisis of Faith, Emotionally Repressed, F/M, Qunari, Slightly Experimental, Speculation, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Wordcount: 100-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-26
Updated: 2014-07-26
Packaged: 2018-02-10 08:51:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2018802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redhandsredribbons/pseuds/redhandsredribbons
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Iron Bull forces a charming grin. "Let's just say I'm searching for who I am."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Asit Tal-Eb

**Author's Note:**

> Mild spoilers for _Dragon Age: Inquisition_ , but only so far as vague information BioWare has officially released. Warnings for mild hints of past trauma, references to alcohol, and swearing.

_Earthquakes must shatter the land._  
_They are bound by their being._  
_Asit tal-eb. It is to be._  
_For the world and the self are one._

— from [the Qun](http://dragonage.wikia.com/wiki/Codex_entry:_The_Qunari_-_Asit_tal-eb)

*

When Bull propositions Adaar—itching for a lover less breakable, aching to lock and slide horns in quiet, immovable push and grapple, too long without a lover like him, and then only in appearance, disdainful of the Qun, in a way that makes his stomach grumble like one shot too many of cheap _basra_ liquor—

—she frowns.

"Does the Qun not dissuade taking lovers for pleasure?" she asks.

Anyone else, and the question would have been teasing. Maybe a snide hint.

But the Inquisitor, this _basra_ -born amnesiac _vashoth_ , chock full of magic? Despite her wary suspicions, she still defers to his guidance on matters of the Qun.

It makes Bull damned uncomfortable. It also puts a careening, dusty halt to his fun.

"You asked me this a week ago about wine!" he complains. "In the middle of a  _wine-drinking tournament_ , no less."

Adaar waits, patient.

"Inquisitor, do you mean to say you judge me?" He mocks a mournful swoon.

"I do not," she says, "if it is who you are."

He'll say this much, she tells the truth. He remembers her unfazed acceptance of a particular bosom-heavy pirate once pardoned of crime through a Champion and Arishok's duel and death, exuding sexuality and mayhem like _qamek_ exudes wisps of smoke. Every day, he witnesses Adaar's matter-of-fact defense of Vivienne's frivolities, of Varric's exaggerations, even of Ghost Boy's nature.

"Is it who you are," she asks, "or do you strive against who you are?"

Bull's missing eye itches and his past prods at his mind. Really? She's really going to go there?

_Vashedan_ fucking _venak hol mashev qalaba_ damned _dathrasi stel brak alat kafir a'bas..._

Iron Bull forces a charming grin. "Let's just say I'm searching for who I am."

Adaar scowls, deepening the ridge of her forehead where horns curve into dark flesh. "Are you not always exactly who you are? You need not seek what is already found. You _are_. And so you will continue to be."

*

She tells them all only that her family name was Adaar, and that her name is now Saarebas. That is what she is, she says. Her hand, so much bigger than Cassandra's or Varric's or Cullen's, but so much smaller than Bull's, glows green with power. She will not tell them her other name. He doesn't even know if she remembers it.

"Do you know what the Qun does to _saarebas_?" he asks her.

She narrows her eyes at him. "You mean what Qunari do to _saarebas_. Is that the truth of the Qun?"

Iron Bull guffaws in surprise. "Maybe I like you after all."

"It does not matter to me if you like me or not," Saarebas says, solemn, shaking her head, her white curls blooming around her face, between her horns. "I like _you_."

*

Bull is not a _tamassran_. But when she asks, he teaches her anyway.

Bull is not an _arvaarad_. But when she asks, he swears to stop her demons.

*

She knows enough Qunlat for it to feel very dangerous when he whispers that she is  _kadan_.

**Author's Note:**

> When I'm writing things quickly, without a beta to temper my wispy run-on sentence poet brain, I write stuff like this. Hmm.
> 
> Once the game gets released, this fic will probably be completely AU and/or out of character. But I wanted to dabble in Iron Bull's identity crisis as a sort-of-Qunari, sort-of-Vashoth, especially when my heart went aflutter at hearing he'll defend the Qunari to others. (He's no Tal-Vashoth, that's for sure.) Doing a little playing around with my planned first Inquisitor, [Saarebas Adaar](http://quequieresmrmorden.tumblr.com/tagged/saarebas), too, though she's not developed yet, due to her being very much subject to change based on the natural progression of the game.
> 
> Thanks for reading! Comments, critiques, and/or squees about Qunari anything welcome!


End file.
